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I use this weblog as my journal, which means I write down both the good and the bad stuff in life. And although I prefer writing when things are good, writing is so much more meaningful when things are tough, and I'm using the weblog to figure life out.

So what's bad is Wellbutrin, the new antidepressant I was on. And I'm bummed. Because while switching anti-d's did make my mind sharper, it was like switching my sex drive to "off." And that is NOT acceptable to me. This week I've gone back on Zoloft, and while overall it's a better choice for me, it really eff-s with my short-term memory and that makes me feel stupid.

I worked for a computer company for 10 years, and that meant I worked with a lot of men who loved science fiction, so I was exposed to a new genre. There was a book by Piers Anthony (I think) where one of the characters was so fascinating that I've always remembered her. This woman changed as the moon changed, so for half of the month she was fascinating to talk with, and a companion in every way a man could want. Only catch? Ugly as ugly can be. As the month progressed, she got more and more beautiful, but less and less interesting. I feel a little like this woman, in that I can feel my "sharpness" slipping away. And it causes me to get very quiet, because in conversation, for example, by the time I get a chance to speak, I've forgotten what I had in my head just moments before.

Maybe I'm like Rush Limbaugh -- "...with one half of my brain tied behind my back!" Honestly, even writing about it is making me feel a little bit better. And it gives me incentive to get my training room DONE, cuz when I train at the gym, I can't rely on a clipboard and notes to know what to do next, and while that's hard for anyone, it's especially challenging for me.

Ok, enough from me. If you're having a three-day weekend, enjoy it like crazy!