Tuesday, September 05, 2006

The Horrors of Shopping

If I was a normal girl, I would love shopping, right? Well, I must be abnormal then, cuz I HATE HATE HATE it!

Yesterday the whole family went shopping. We had a list of things that needed getting, but also had some time for browsing. I stopped in at Ann Taylor to do a couple of returns, and Tim suggested I stay and see if they had anything that would work for me. After a disagreement, I agreed to go in and look around. (Note -- that's the first sign that I'm a freak -- who argues with their husband when he suggests they buy something?!)

I picked up a few things to try on and went into the dressing room. There was another woman there, with her baby/toddler in tow. The little girl was loudly vocalizing the whole time her mom was trying stuff on. And a sales clerk was busily bringing things in for the mom to try and giving second opinions, as I was trying things on, looking in the mirror, thinking "looks stupid" and going on to the next thing.

Here's what didn't work about shopping last night:

1. I felt left out. Although I give off a vibe of "Don't talk to me" when I shop because of fear, I would have loved some help in figuring out if things fit or looked good. I was envious of the ease and the help offered the other woman.

2. The yelling child. I went for YEARS without shopping because I wouldn't do that to other people or to my child. Again, I envied her ease -- the apparent "yeah, I need to go shopping, and I'm going to" that she had.

3. A loaded question. "So what jewelry would I wear with this?" she asked to the sales clerk. WHAT??? You'll wear one of your two pairs of earrings like I do, you idiot! (Ok, that sounded harsh, but it's what I thought.) Actually I'm down to one pair of earrings cuz the clasp on my silver hoops broke. Tucker found a pair that he brought to my attention, and I bought them, so there!

All this angst, from something that's supposed to be fun! Sometimes I get very tired of operating from old stuff and hurt and fear. And I can only imagine how hard it would be if I didn't like the size I wore, or had a husband who discouraged shopping.

Enough said. I did buy a pair of pants, two t-shirts, a sweater, and a skirt that doesn't work with anything else I own (so more shopping will be required). Maybe it's time to just tell the "I'm stupid and don't know how to dress myself" voice in my head to shut up.

End of rant. I'm hoping the next time I write I'll sound just a little more sane!


Eileen said...

I went shopping this weekend too. THAT SAME BABY was in the stall next to me too...screaming the entire time. I had Caitlyn with me but she was well-behaved (other than a fat comment or two). I also don't shop with a screaming kid...it's too hard to think. And I always tell the people I don't need help, but I really do, I just don't like someone telling me what to do.

I wear the same pair of earrings every day...diamond studs. They were my mom's so that is my excuse, plus they go with anything. I have a lot of "real" jewelry, but I got most of it when I was working and wore suits/fancy clothes so none of it looks right with Nike t-shirts!

I want the What Not To Wear people to come help me out. I don't want to go on the show, I just want the help.

A long way for me to say, I know where you are coming from!

Jules said...

Well that makes two of us because I hate shopping, too. I wonder if we'd like it better if our husbands DID discourage our purchases ... then it might feel sneeky and naughty which would inevitably make it more fun.

doidle said...

I hear ya on the shopping. My dh doesn't mind when I shop, either! With 2 little kids I feel like, why bother, when there's just going to be handprints & sticky crap all over it. I just live in my workout gear and appluad myself for saving money. I'm down to one pair of earrings too!!!! Cute pants, though!

jennifer said...

You guys are NUTS! Shopping is a stress reliever for me. I love clothes and I love finding unique and sexy outfits. Like the lion, I like to hunt alone.

I will help a friend in need, but when I am looking for myself, I like to be alone and I don't need help from some suck-up sales person...sorry to anyone in retail that may read this.

Try shopping online, if you hate the whole experience. www.bluefly.com has great stuff.

I miss the shopping in America. I don't care what anyone says, they have better stuff there. You hear that Italy???

I don't like the big group changing rooms. Lots of that action in NY, but they have the BEST shopping, by far.

I go to Target just to decompress.

PS. I have nice jewelry, but I wear nothing...unless it is some "event."
My style is Angelina Jolie. I don't look like her, but I like her style. Sexy, classy, and her beauty does the talking, not the clothes.
WOW! I could write my own post about this.

Lori said...

I agree with you 100% on everything you said.


jenjuno said...

I hate shopping, too. I especially hate trying things on. That all changed when Nordstrom's came to town last year.

It makes a HUGE difference when you have a sales person you can trust who will bring you more sizes, give you an honest opinion and make recommendations.

I feel like I have ADD when I go shopping. I can't focus. I can't put anything together and then I get frustrated. I do well when I have a supportive friend with me whose style I like and whose opinion I trust.

So I recommend you enlist the help of a good friend who can pull together outfits and accessories for you without you having to think. Just try everything on and be done with it.

LOL at the earrings comment. Oh yeah. That's me all the way!